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Natasha Anne Kelleher

CANSURVIVE

Updated: Dec 6, 2022

Written in thanks to all of the breast cancer charities


THERE IS A ROGUE CELL CALLED C

THAT SEEMS TO BE IMPOSSIBLE TO CURE LINGERING AROUND FOR CENTURIES

ITS INTENTIONS ANYTHING BUT PURE

NOR ITS TARGETS OUT OF REACH OR INSEDENTRY

YET NO MATTER HOW WE TRY TO ALTER ITS COURSE

THAT INVADES AND DIVIDES GOOD CELLS TO INFLAMMATORY

HOLDING ITS TARGET WITH PREDATORY FORCE

LIKE AN UNFORGIVING MILITARY ARMY

IT MAY JUST START IN ONE PLACE

THE BODY IT CAN OFTEN OVERWHELMS

THEN GRADUALLY SPREADS ITS WAY CALMLY

NO-ONE COULD SUSPECT IS PRESENCE

OR WHY ITS AT YOUR HELM

THAT IS WHY IT NEEDS TO BE DETECTED EARLY

CAUGHT WHILST ON ITS MARCHING ERRANT WAY

WITH RIGHT TREATMENT TO CRUCIALLY HELP TO DETER

ITS SOMETIMES ANILIATING SWAY


BRUTAL A DEADLY THREAT

SURGING ON RELENTLESSLY LIKE A FATAL WEAPON

COMPROMISING YOUR IMMUNITIY SYSTEM'S DEFENCES

STOMPING THOUGH YOUR HEALTH AND LIFE

ALLOCATING TO IT A SHAMBLING UNCONTROLLABLE

FEELING THAT SUDDENLY YOUR LIFE HAS TAKEN ON

AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT AND SCARILY UNKNOWN MEANING

JUDDERING YOUR LIFE AS IT WAS

TO A STUTTERING UNWISHED AND UNWANTED STOP


THE DISEASE'S IMPACT INVADING

BODY AND MIND WITH TERROR

AS THE SITUATION PAINFULLY NERVE WRACKINGLY

GRADUALLY HEARTSTOPPINGLY UNFOLDS

YOU FEEL LIKE YOU ARE DISAPPEARING

LIKE ALICE IN WONDERLAND DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE

INTO AN UNKNOWN PLACE OF NIGHTMARES

OF WHY'S IF'S HOW'S AND DREADED OUTCOMES

MAKING YOU FEEL SO VULNERABLE AND ILLER

A BOAT ON RAPIDS WITHOUT ITS TILLER


DESPITE THE BEST INTENTIONS OF EMPATHY

FROM FAMILY AND FRIENDS IT FADES EVENTUALLY

THOUGH NEEDED AND APPRECIATED

YOU FEEL MORE LOST AND ISOLATED AND AT SEA

THAN YOU EVER THOUGHT WAS POSSIBLE

IN THIS EVER CHANGING CHALLENGE

ITS FORCE NEVER NEGATED

WORDS CAN SOOTHE NOT HEAL YOU

OR DISPEL YOUR FEAR AWAY

IT IS THE LONLIEST TASK IN LIFE

TO TRY AND NOT SEEM FRIGHTENED

TO LOOK AND SOUND EVER BRAVE

IN THE TSUNAMI OF CANCER'S RAGE


SO YOU BATTLE ON VALIANTLY AS ONE CAN ONLY DO

FOR WHAT IS THE ALTERNATIVE ONLY TO LEAVE

ALL AROUND YOU FEELING HELPLESS AND BLUE

SO YOU FORGE ON QUIETLY

WHILST FRIENDS SOMETIMES DISAPPEAR

REMIND YOURSELF DO NOT BLUSTER

USING ANY REMAINING STRENGTH

YOU CAN INTERMITENTLY MUSTER

SO TO AVOID THEM SOMETIMES FEELING FLUSTERED

NOT KNOWING WHAT TO DO OR SAY

HOPING THAT YOU YOURSELF CAN

ACT AND SOUND NORMAL

THEN PEOPLE AROUND YOU DON'T SEEM UNEASY

WHEN THEY FIND OUT YOU ARE

ONE OF THE INFLICTED ONE OUT OF TWO PEOPLE

PREDICTED WILL BE A CANCER STATISTIC ALONG WITH YOU


IN TURN THIS MAKES YOU FEEL LIKE YOU CANNOT GO ON

EVEN FOR ANOTHER HOUR LET ALONE ANOTHER DAY

YOU FEEL LIKE YOU WANT TO DROP YOUR GUARD

YET LIKE A PRISONER YOU ARE BOUND TO

ACCEPT THIS SENTENCE AND TAKE UP THE CAUSE TO FIGHT

WITH EVERYTHING YOU HAVE IN EVERY POSITIVE WAY

AS THE SHADOW OF CANCER NEVER FADES

IT LIES LURKING LIKE A BURGLAR READY TO ROB

THE TIME YOU HAVE BELIEVE YOU HAVE LEFT

AS YOU KNOW IN YOUR HEART

THAT EVEN IN REMISSION THIS IS A CHALLENGE

THAT WILL LAST TO THE END OF YOUR DAYS


YET SOMEHOW YOU LEARN TO ADJUST AND CARRY

ON REGARDLESS OF YOUR PHYSICAL STATE

AS THE MEANING OF EVERYTHING

HAS BECOME TO YOU SO MUCH MORE CLEAR

IT IS THE PRECIOUS GIFT OF LIFE WE CLING ON TO

KNOWING IT'S VALUE OF FRIENDS FAMILY

DOCTORS NURSES AND HOSPITAL STAFF

THAT STEAR YOU THROUGH THE GATEWAY

TO HELP YOU TRY AND FORGET YOUR DAILY INNTER FEAR

NOW WE LOVE REVERE AND CHERISH THEM SO ACCUTELY

AS THEY ARE YOUR SUN MOON THE AIR AND THE STARS

HOWEVER LONG YOU CAN SPEND WITH THEM

WILL BE FULL OF LIFE LOVE AND POIGNANT MEMORIES

THAT CAN NEVER BE FORGOTTEN OR MARRED


Copyright Natasha Anne Kelleher October 16th 2020

All Rights Reserved - No reproduction of either written word or photography


Photograph by Natasha Anne Kelleher


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